Under overcast skies the lands are lush with green and my thoughts are scattered with abundance. Maize is cropping up everywhere, some tall as an infant, and tobacco is brooding in distant fields. Grass has grown wild and the flowers bloom their petals from the brush. It is January and the rains have been disappointing. The village is worried but is hopeful the conditions will improve as these are the peak months for rainfall. One can imagine the devastation of a dry year.
I don’t say this enough to the people around me. Be it close friends or family, often taking them for granted. Unfortunately, I have a habit of being thankful instead for the attentions of pursuits. As if I had earned it, as if it was some great accomplishment. The point is its too late. A lifetime of benefiting from the generosities of those closest to me, how can I possibly show my gratitude? It is more immense than words, especially to my mother, father, and sister. Some day I hope to return to you all you have done for me, but for today all I can offer you is my thanks.
You may not be proud of everything I do or say. You may be disappointed, frustrated, angry, saddened and even heartbroken. For these things I am truly sorry, but I’m navigating my own course through this world, making sense of it the best I can. This world: so different from home, placed high atop a silver steeple. We climbed on your shoulders up only to find another steeple above. While you will always have that old world, home, we have only this world. Peering over the edge is an abyss and someday we will be stranded here, your shoulders no longer there to permit us home.
So thank you. Thank you for bringing us out, leaving home, to give us the opportunities you never had. Thank you for allowing us the freedom to choose any life we wanted. Thank you for sponsoring us to pursue that life so that we have no obligations and are free. Thank you for all the little things, from scrapes to pickups. Thank you for being there for the happiest moments and sad ones. Thank you for coming to Malawi, not many families do, and I am privileged that you did. Thank for all these wonderful gifts you brought of food and gadgets that are entirely too much for one person.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Friday, January 7, 2011
Santa Baby
I returned to Mwazisi seven days into the New Year. After recovering from my parents leaving and drudging going back to work. When I left I had a memory of my village: green, people planting tobacco and maize, and power lines zigzagging through the trading center. However, returning I see a whole new village. It’s as if Santa Claus ho-ho’d through this place and everyone’s been good boys and girls.
Almost every wired house now has at least two satellite dishes and of course a TV. I walked into my landlord’s shop to pay my rent and saw a brand new TV hooked up to a new DVD player. My neighbors had their whole house wired for electricity. Keep in mind their son didn’t have any money to buy books and stationary for the new term. There is now a barber shop in town and a cinema house. A new sheltered market was constructed at the fork, rendering the old informal market useless.
All this development is astounding and makes me thankful for those wonderful folks at the World Bank. But my concern is with the money. Unfortunately, Santa Claus doesn’t exist, meaning all these wonderful gadgets were paid for out of pocket. At a time of year when everyone, everyone, is complaining of insufficient funds to pay for fertilizer, what is left? People are taking loans out to pay for their fields, yet buying satellite dishes and TVs?
To top it all off, the future for tobacco in Malawi is looking more dismal with passing week. Demand for this year was already reduced and in five years most farmers will not be able to sell anything unless the ban is lifted. I understand improvements such as a cinema house and barbershop are investments, but with such an uncertain and frightening future, buying a TV is the least of concerns.
Then again who am I to question the quest for impulsive, frivolous, material acquisition? I come from a country rife with financial turmoil because of this very same ailment. Fortunately, credit cards have yet to infect Malawi and the country is not crucially tied to the world economy. The West is on top of the world, culturally and for a time financially. Whether we wanted the prestige or not we accepted it enthusiastically.
With great power comes great responsibility. We are the model for the rest of the world, especially the developing world. Here, young adults embrace every rap star (keenly Sean Paul) and Chuck Norris as the people they want to be. They also know every minute detail, though mostly false, of President Obama. The more urban youth prefer a wider range of musicians and even politicians, but it is still fascinating that this is what we broadcast. This is the way the world views Americans and America.
While Rick Ross is rhyming in front of tricked out DB9s, Snookie works on looking like a fat cheetoh and the Black Eyed Peas get ready for another “good night,” the real America ain’t no picnic. Americans are not partying every night from boredom and driving around in BMWs. Some are but not the majority and there is no question that the middle class got carried away. We watch shows like Jersey Shore, Real Housewives, Real World and we feel better about ourselves that we are not so shallow. The developing world watches these shows and feels inadequate that it has none of those luxuries.
It is no one’s fault. For every negative aspect of western media there is a positive impact. As Flamboyant said “you can’t pick and choose, you have to accept it all.” Mwazisi will be alright. Besides the World Bank, Total Land Care has initiated a three year biodiversity project in the area, one of two areas chosen in all of Malawi. The future is not dim, but I wish people were just smarter about their spending. They listen to American news radio and update me on President Obama. I wish they instead listened to and understood the economic crisis and its causes. Video killed the radio star. Even if I tell them, they wouldn’t believe me.
Almost every wired house now has at least two satellite dishes and of course a TV. I walked into my landlord’s shop to pay my rent and saw a brand new TV hooked up to a new DVD player. My neighbors had their whole house wired for electricity. Keep in mind their son didn’t have any money to buy books and stationary for the new term. There is now a barber shop in town and a cinema house. A new sheltered market was constructed at the fork, rendering the old informal market useless.
All this development is astounding and makes me thankful for those wonderful folks at the World Bank. But my concern is with the money. Unfortunately, Santa Claus doesn’t exist, meaning all these wonderful gadgets were paid for out of pocket. At a time of year when everyone, everyone, is complaining of insufficient funds to pay for fertilizer, what is left? People are taking loans out to pay for their fields, yet buying satellite dishes and TVs?
To top it all off, the future for tobacco in Malawi is looking more dismal with passing week. Demand for this year was already reduced and in five years most farmers will not be able to sell anything unless the ban is lifted. I understand improvements such as a cinema house and barbershop are investments, but with such an uncertain and frightening future, buying a TV is the least of concerns.
Then again who am I to question the quest for impulsive, frivolous, material acquisition? I come from a country rife with financial turmoil because of this very same ailment. Fortunately, credit cards have yet to infect Malawi and the country is not crucially tied to the world economy. The West is on top of the world, culturally and for a time financially. Whether we wanted the prestige or not we accepted it enthusiastically.
With great power comes great responsibility. We are the model for the rest of the world, especially the developing world. Here, young adults embrace every rap star (keenly Sean Paul) and Chuck Norris as the people they want to be. They also know every minute detail, though mostly false, of President Obama. The more urban youth prefer a wider range of musicians and even politicians, but it is still fascinating that this is what we broadcast. This is the way the world views Americans and America.
While Rick Ross is rhyming in front of tricked out DB9s, Snookie works on looking like a fat cheetoh and the Black Eyed Peas get ready for another “good night,” the real America ain’t no picnic. Americans are not partying every night from boredom and driving around in BMWs. Some are but not the majority and there is no question that the middle class got carried away. We watch shows like Jersey Shore, Real Housewives, Real World and we feel better about ourselves that we are not so shallow. The developing world watches these shows and feels inadequate that it has none of those luxuries.
It is no one’s fault. For every negative aspect of western media there is a positive impact. As Flamboyant said “you can’t pick and choose, you have to accept it all.” Mwazisi will be alright. Besides the World Bank, Total Land Care has initiated a three year biodiversity project in the area, one of two areas chosen in all of Malawi. The future is not dim, but I wish people were just smarter about their spending. They listen to American news radio and update me on President Obama. I wish they instead listened to and understood the economic crisis and its causes. Video killed the radio star. Even if I tell them, they wouldn’t believe me.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Eleven
A new year, perhaps a new self? Isn’t that what we all wish for? Who can claim they are truly happy with themselves? Not in a superficial or trivial manner, but content with principles, love, and being good in a world that drifts in ever greyer skies.
The world is flat and my family has returned to the other side. I’m sad now for a lot of reasons. It seems the year in hindsight was only a handful of days and world continues to falter. My earnest hope for restoring my faith in humanity has vanished wholly, perhaps with only crumbs remaining at the bottom of my heart.
Work and family pilfering all of my energies and efforts; I forgot the world around me. In a way, it was more peaceful. To pause and breathe your surroundings means the foul stench of the world fills your being. A suffocating darkness consumes you, yet you regain the ability to interact.
I have been out of Mwazisi for quite sometime now. My mind shut down, I’m stalling. My phone rings at least 15 times a day from site calling on project status, logistics, and a laundry list of work left. It is not work I fear, but the solitude. The quiet of my days I accepted as a reality, but for the past month my home was filled with sound.
Music, voices, laughter, chatter, the opening of gifts, the clatter of pots in the kitchen. I will fall back to my way of life again. Pachoko pachoko. Rebuild the walls. The past year gifted me many new lessons, friends and adventures. Hang my hopes. Little by little.
Happy New Year.
The world is flat and my family has returned to the other side. I’m sad now for a lot of reasons. It seems the year in hindsight was only a handful of days and world continues to falter. My earnest hope for restoring my faith in humanity has vanished wholly, perhaps with only crumbs remaining at the bottom of my heart.
Work and family pilfering all of my energies and efforts; I forgot the world around me. In a way, it was more peaceful. To pause and breathe your surroundings means the foul stench of the world fills your being. A suffocating darkness consumes you, yet you regain the ability to interact.
I have been out of Mwazisi for quite sometime now. My mind shut down, I’m stalling. My phone rings at least 15 times a day from site calling on project status, logistics, and a laundry list of work left. It is not work I fear, but the solitude. The quiet of my days I accepted as a reality, but for the past month my home was filled with sound.
Music, voices, laughter, chatter, the opening of gifts, the clatter of pots in the kitchen. I will fall back to my way of life again. Pachoko pachoko. Rebuild the walls. The past year gifted me many new lessons, friends and adventures. Hang my hopes. Little by little.
Happy New Year.
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